I wasnt going to mention this on here because I didnt feel it was the place. I did pm a couple guys about it but thats diffrent. However, now Im having a tough time on making a MAJOR decision and need to express myself and see some outside opions. So be fore warned this could get long winded and a little ranted.....
Two weeks ago I got a text message from my boys mom saying that I needed to go home in the morning instead of going to her house. You see for the past I guess 3 months we had decided to try to fix our relationship. And when I got this new job we was discussing taking the next step and me moving in with her. When I received this text I called her and she said her phone was going dead and she could only text. She went out to eat with a guy from work and didnt want me around. Well she told me where she went and I headed that way. Walked in and said Ive heard so much about so and so for a good while now I figured it was time we met. We sat there and ate, but I knew something wasnt right. She was sitting beside my 2nd cousin one of his buddys. But the drinks seemed to be all out of place as well as the packs of smokes on the table. Not to mention that no one would look me in the eyes except for her. And she was full of hate. After we ate we went outside and started to talk it didnt take 5 minutes and she wanted the house key back. I told her I was going to go get my stuff and she could have it after that. While I was getting my stuff she came home and we continued to talk. However, after I left I meant to ask her something honestly I dont rember what but with her phone dead I turned back and she was gone. That afternoon I went back over there to see if cooler heads could prevail and guess what she just got home went over to so and so’s and stayed basically all night. Slept over there anyways. She made the comment that it was a mistake to go over there but nothing happened. We talked for the next 2 days and she’d break down crying everytime then suddenly she got cold hearted. I asked for a sit down with ole boy since it now appeared our relationship was over. He tried to punk me out in front of her and twisted everything he could that I would say. Took everything I had not to beat the shit out of him right there. Now he is living with her, supposively as friends but this past sunday she asked if she could take the boy out to eat for breakfast but when I called to tell her he was up. She didnt sound like she wanted to go said she had been napping and told me to hold on. Came back on the phone after about a minute and said she’d be there in 30-45 minutes but she was bringing so and so with her. I told her that wasnt going to fly she could get him but he wasnt welcomed here. Not right now. She ended up blowing our son off to stay with her new “friend”.
Ok thats the set up in a nut shell. That hurt me so bad that I lost 20lbs in a week. I honestly beleive I know how Adam Sandlers character felt in Reign Over Me. I honestly wanted to die but I pushed on because of my son. After she stood him up though it woke me up that no matter what I could never love her like I did when she’s willing to put another man before our child. I lost all respect for her with these latest two incidents. Honestly this would be the 5th time she’s cheated on me or done something similar Im a dumb arse I know.
Ok ok...Let me get to my #1 point of this thread now. Today I went and visited my lawyer. And he told me that if the judge awards her custody of the boy that I would be awarded visitation. And even though we both work 12 hour swing shifts on the same schedule I would receive my son on my weekends off. Right now Im getting him on the days I work and about 10am on the Sundays we are off and about 3pm on the Tuesdays we are off. Which is every other week. HOwever, I need to get out of the parents house and that means Id see even less of him with this current arrangment. Also I wont have to pay child support if it stays this way. Im not worried about the money I promise you all that. She’s only going to request $50 bucks but Ive been told where she makes more money than I it might be less than that. What Im trying to decide is spending every other weekend and a minimum of 4 hours once a week worth seeing him basicaly 3-4 days every week even if its just for a few hours. Its a question of quality time v.s. more days with him. It will take me a couple weeks to get the lawyer fees and court cost money saved up so I dont need to answer that today. Also I dont beleive and Im not going to tell her about this possible outcome. Our current arrangment was not and is not court ordered. We have never been to court over our son. But thats soon to change. What do you think you would do?
